Ok, so the Zeno joke wasn\t very funny *ancient greek philosophers and references to obscure philosophical paradoxes, as well as inside blog humor_?how could that joke possiblyhave gone wrong__?). Now my keyboard seems to have taken a premature vacation, but I just wanted to stop by to promise that more substantial posting resumes tomorrow, first with a lengthy post concerning Bill Clinton\s hairdo, and to point you towards this gem of the internets {: the aptly named Shorpy. It\s a weblog which posts the most wonderful photographs from before the 1950\s and all the back to the invention of the photograph. It\s almost guaranteed to raise goosebumps every time.

Zeno of Elea, noted Ancient Greek Philosopher, Murdered Near Home

(AP) - Ancient Athens, Ancient Greece.

Noted ancient Greek philosopher Zeno of Elea was found dead by slaves today outside his residence in Ancient Athens. Details of mr. Of Elea's death are still sketchy and unclear, but the city guards have released information indicating that mr. Of Elea had been brutally murdered while attempting to leave his house.

Sources close to the household said that mr. Of Elea had been struck in the chest by several arrows. Ground nearby seemed to hold many turtle tracks. Tortoistic involvement is suspected by city guards.

Said one nearby gentleman: "had it coming, 'e did."

Zeno of Elea, MA

I find that trying to finish an MA thesis is like living on the inside of Zeno's paradoxes, which go like this: if person M, let's say a student of comparative literature, is trying to get from point X to point Y, let's say X is being unemployable and Y is the finish point of an MA thesis, he'll have to write the appropriate number of pages to get from his starting position to point Y.

Easy as π. Except first he writes half his thesis, no problem. Next, he writes half of what is left, leaving a quarter of the way to go. Then, he writes half of that, and he now has an eighth to go. But since this guy is pretty dumb, and probably watching House M.D. obsessively instead of working, he keeps just going half of the remaining distance. And as you know, Xenophon, since all numbers are infinitely recursive, he has to keep covering half the distance. Forever. He'll never get to that magic last page. On the other hand, the same thought holds for dying, so he'll never die or run out of House M.D. episodes to watch, either. Sweet.