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14.11.05

I didn't know they had Nigerians in Shanghai

This one was particularly juicy, I thought. Both because of the Oriental angle, and because of the absolutely wonderful highlighted paragraph, which is just wrong on so many levels.

Dear Sir/Ma

REPRESENTATIVE NEEDED

I represent The above named Company based in China. My company manufacture, supply and export Pharmaceutics, Agricultural, Textile and engineering chemical Products for world trade.

We are searching for representatives who can help us establish a medium of getting to our customers in Europe and America as well as making payments through you as our payment officer. In our just concluded Annual General Meeting (AGM) of September 30th 2005, A Board Member in this Company Mr Philip Churchill who explained why the company needed a representative and therefore adviced that responsible people could be employed using there e-mail address to contact them.

I as the UK branch officer of this multinational company have been directed to relate with you because of the communication problem faced by most of our Board Member since many of them cannot read, speak or write English Language except Chinnese which is our official Language Fluently.

In view of this you are expected to relate directly with me as the company representative since i have been mandated to contact you and give them frequent update about our activities.

Most of our customers pay out in cash, cheques or money orders and we do not have an account in U.S.A presently that will clear this money. It is upon this note that we seek your assistance to stand in as our representative in your country. Note that Details of your account is not needed in this transaction, Also, as our representative, you will receive 10% of whatever amount you clear for the company and the balance will be paid to us.If you are interested in this business transaction.

I shall love to hear from you soonest.

Thank you for your time.

Very Respectfully,

[Picture of dodgy-looking Chinese man and a signature]

2 Comments:

Anonymous Anonymous said...

... and today I discovered that the Ivory Coast is located in the Czech Republic where they write a strange French (withinterestingly strangecompoundwords):

"Honorable
Très cher,
je suis Mme Edeliynn Vieira de Côte d'Ivoire. Je suisveuve et j'ai
perdu mon mari il y a quelques annéesauparavant. Mon mari était un
directeur de conseil de la branche cacao exportant a l'étranger
jusqu'à sa mort. ... etc."

However, judging from the letter they have the same lack of banking facilities in the Czech Republic as in Nigeria and Shanghai. Not much globalized economy there ...

November 14, 2005 5:49 pm  
Blogger mrtn said...

Killer! We can get rich together. Only don't tell anyone, ok?

November 14, 2005 6:29 pm  

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